The category for ‘Resiliency’ defines perseverance while undergoing unrevealed health tribulations.

By Maria G. O’Donnell

Who has made an extraordinary impact on your life? A parent, Scout leader, clergy, friend – or how about a teacher?

Elaine Kotler of West Hartford is one such teacher. As an exceptional middle school science teacher at Henry James Memorial School in Simsbury, Kotler was the recipient of the inaugural HMH Lighthouse Award. Based on the running theme of the book The Lighthouse Effect, textbook publisher Houghton Mifflin Harcourt (HMH) created a nationwide contest seeking nominations for this award in a quest to recognize a “Teacher Who Makes an Extraordinary Impact.”

Educators were honored during Teacher Appreciation Week. There were over 500 submissions from families, teachers, and administrators across the country, celebrating their nominees’ extraordinary commitment and contributions inside and outside of the classroom.

Grand prizes were awarded to one recipient in each of 10 categories: 1) Demonstrates Selflessness, 2) Guides Others Through Uncertain Times, 3) Is Constant and Consistent, 4) Turns Doubts into Destinations, 5) Helps Others See Possibilities over Circumstances, 6) Has the Courage to Encourage, 7) Embodies Innovation, 8) Empowers and Inspires Through Example, 9) Exemplifies a Spirit of Resiliency, and 10) Sees Beyond the Surface.

Kotler’s nominator (her mom) had difficulty choosing which category, believing the teacher embodies the characteristics of all 10, but only one could be selected. The nominator chose Exemplifies a Spirit of Resiliency, which provided this description: “Tireless, resolved and upbeat, this teacher personifies what it means to persevere through strife and struggle to bring healing and support.”

Indeed, Kotler knows the meaning of perseverance thought strife. Typically keeping her health issues to herself, she finally revealed her breast cancer diagnosis of July 2019 that led to a double mastectomy and chemo, followed by multiple surgeries, especially on her hands, plus a breakdown of her musculoskeletal system, possibly due to the chemo. On top of that, she had a recent fall and broke her wrist.

“I’m making the best of it,” said Kotler. “I keep a positive attitude, otherwise I don’t know where I’d be.” With 13 surgeries in three years, herein lies the reason to be awarded the Spirit of Resiliency.

She found out that she received the award while visiting her mother, who also lives in West Hartford. Kotler knew her mom had submitted the award nomination and required essay, but only by a chance check of her email on her mom’s computer did she make her discovery about the Lighthouse Award.

“I won!” Kotler recalled. “I was so happy; it was very exciting.” She acknowledged that her mom “knows me and what I do, even when I’m not feeling well. She was a teacher and gets it.” Kotler admitted she kept her medical problems hidden from her students and most of her colleagues and that the award for resiliency “really describes me and how I keep going.”

She had never heard of this particular award before, especially since it’s a newly-created recognition. “The award is based on a book [The Lighthouse Effect by Steve Pemberton] with the concept of a teacher always being there for the kids,” Kotler explained. “There are 10 different categories, and my mother chose resilience because I’ve been through so much. The kids didn’t know. They don’t realize how hard it is, but I can deal with the pain. They need a good learning experience.”

Barnes & Noble offered this overview of the book The Lighthouse Effect on their website: “In this stirring follow-up to his memoir, Steve Pemberton gives practical encouragement for how you can be a ‘human lighthouse’ for others and through these inspiring stories will renew your hope for humanity…The humble gestures of kindness that change the course of our lives can shift the course for America too. With a unique vision for building up individuals and communities and restoring trust, The Lighthouse Effect opens your eyes to those who are quietly heroic. You will reflect on the lighthouses in your own life and be reminded that the greatest heroes are alongside us – and within us.”

Students know they’re in for something special just by “Miss K’s” outfits alone. “I wear a different outfit every single day,” she said, “usually with a theme. The kids vote on my Halloween costume or holiday sweater theme – snowmen, cats, penguins.” When Kotler arrives in the sweater with the most votes, students are thrilled for having voted for that particular theme. She would even design her face masks with something new each day.

Academically, Kotler believes the best experiences for the students are “to give engaging, entertaining lessons.” Even kids in her study hall marvel at the props she uses, making Newton’s Law fun to learn about, enabling it to “stick in their mind for years to come: ‘I remember doing this with Miss K.’”

She went out with a triple-bang right before the end of the school year to embark on a medical procedure for her foot. At the middle school’s Spring Festival on June 1, Kotler decided to take her first-ever shot at being a “dunkee” at the dunk tank. Even with her painful foot, she claimed, “It wasn’t so bad, but climbing in and out was a challenge.”

Two strong-armed ball throwers’ shots dropped the tank bench so fast, she was dunked, bum-first, into the water. The third shot wasn’t as fierce, and – uh-oh! – the bench released slowly, and she landed feet first. Not good when one is in pain! But the water felt good on that unusually hot early June day. Still, she was ready to go home for the summer by the last dunk.

Next year, Kotler will leave the middle school for Simsbury High, where she will teach a ninth-grade science course, Integrated and Physical Science. Since 2001, she has maintained a position as an adjunct faculty at Manchester Community College, teaching oceanography, earth science, natural disasters, and environmental sciences.

An active member of the American Legion Auxiliary, Hayes-Velhage Post 96 of West Hartford, Kotler is their historian, as well as chair of Education, Americanism and other committees. In 2022 she was named the “Unit Member of the Year” by the Department of Connecticut American Legion Auxiliary.

Although she cannot travel (to prevent blood clots), Kotler will be sent her Lighthouse Effect award to her home. Otherwise, HMH Lighthouse Award recipients will receive a trip to Orlando, FL, to be formally recognized at an HMH-hosted breakfast, luncheon and dinner event.

At her school in the 2023-2024 school year, Kotler will receive a visit from The Lighthouse Effect author and acclaimed speaker, Steve Pemberton, along with Carmen Ortiz-McGhee, one of the “lighthouses” featured in Steve’s book.

Kotler currently enjoys the company of her “children,” her two cats, Skipper and Lovey, whom the students know very well from previous COVID online sessions from her West Hartford home.

The nomination essay entered on behalf of Elaine Kotler:

“Elaine is enthusiastic, energetic, encouraging, empathetic, exciting and engaging. She suffers from tremendous health issues, including cancer. Yet, her students are not aware of her chronic pain and daily struggles. Thirteen operations in three years were scheduled around school vacation to avoid absences. Her students, present and past, constantly express their love for her, describing her compassion and humor. Students long since graduated keep in contact and visit to reminisce of wonderful memories that occurred in her classroom, a welcoming and friendly atmosphere. She is driven to provide the best educational experiences even in the face of adversity.”

A version of this story previously appeared in the July issue of West Hartford LIFE.

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