Thoughts and ruminations about being a working mom, raising two daughters, and being Italian … while trying to maintain my sanity and organized closets. (My husband’s laugh, red wine, and ironing make me happy.)

By Adria Giordano

Queen of Hearts

Here’s the thing about being a mom …

You hear even before your child is born, how hard it will be to have a baby.

How your life will change.

How hard it will be to leave them in their crib to cry it out.

How hard it will be to walk them into kindergarten.

How hard it will be to see them choose their friends over you.

How hard it will be when their feelings get hurt. How hard it will be when they fall and get hurt for the first time.

Or sit back and watch them become their own person … needing you less and less.

How hard it will be to raise a teenager who begins to doubt, defy, and disobey.

How hard it will be when they begin to drive.

How hard it will be when they become who they are supposed to become and you need to step back more and more and let them be.

But what they don’t ever tell you is how hard it is to let them manage their own lives. Little by little.

How hard it is to watch them make mistakes and allow them to make mistakes. While you stand by, brush them off, and tell them they can do this.

What they don’t tell you is how hard your heart will hurt when they are hurting. Or sad. Or confused. Or how much you wish you could take away their pain with a wave of a wand. Like the kind they used to play with when they were little.

What they don’t tell you is you need to have a strong heart.

Such a strong heart.

A heart made of steel. Tough enough to endure childhood, but soft enough so it can bend and twist and stretch, but not break. Strong enough to endure pain, and tears and sadness, but at the same time be completely functioning and able to give love, and strength, and everything else a child needs.

Here’s the thing about being a mom … Your life will most definitely change.

As I look at the two growing hearts next to me, I see how much my heart has endured. How much it has seen and felt and witnessed. Thousands of tears and endless laughter. An emotional rollercoaster of joy and sorrow.

Maybe as moms, there is a lot we aren’t supposed to know until the time comes. And maybe it’s best if we just figure it out as we go along. Who knows? All I know is one thing – we are, most definitely, the Queen of Hearts.  

Adria Giordano describes herself as a mom, wife, fundraiser, party planner, and blogger. She is a currently the director of development for Chrysalis Center in Hartford, CT. She lives in West Hartford with her husband, two teenage daughters, and mini goldendoodle puppy.

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